I turned 73 today. And what a horrible anniversary I've reached! Where are my poor children and countless grandchildren? What are they doing? I'm feeling down, the prospect of hunger terrifies me. The court of enquiry informed me today that ten armed riders and two state officials will arrive tomorrow.
I've just returned from the deck. It's a beautiful summer day, waves have calmed down, there are a cloudless sky and an almost full moon. I've been thinking about you, about Helsingfors, about the Black Sea, where I walked on the deck just like now, about the Gulf of Riga, about meeting you in Helsingfors. Everything has changed, only your dear, gentle image has remained the same, just as important to me as before. See more
I can see it so clearly tonight, on this quiet moonlit night at the ocean. Can it be true that you used to be so close to me, walked with me for hours, I was near you and kissed your hands, and today I estimated the distance between us - about 3000 miles, but it's getting larger with every spin of the screw. It will be around 4500 in Washington in a straight line and about 5000 of an actual way. It's been a month since I've received your last letter.
I feel much better in Moscow than in Petrograd in terms of friends. We are staying at the home of some very good people (44, Bolshaya Nikitskaya) and Sonya is very happy that they are giving us food. I believe we'll stay here for the winter.
Horrible news. Riga is captured by Germans. A plated fist is looming over Petrograd. It's still far away, but we don't know if the revolutionary army is strong enough, and no one knows what would it look like when three million people start fleeing Petrograd.
Such a nice day. An annoying wind made it impossible to take a walk along the banks of the riveç, or in the forest. We read on the balcony and passed three hours in 188 the garden. In the evening, as usual, we played dominoes.