Occasionally he was in better spirits, and more like his old cheerful self. The Emperor was generally able to see the humour of any situation, and he would sometimes laugh at the idea of being, what he called, “an Ex.” Everything was then “Ex.”
“Don’t call me an Empress any more — I’m only an Ex,” laughed the Empress; and one day, when some especially unpalatable ham was served at lunch, the Emperor remarked,
“Well, this may have once been ham, but now it’s nothing but an ‘ex-ham.’”
He was always amused by the likeness between him and his cousin. King George. One day he showed me a photograph of the latter, saying,
“Have you seen my last photograph, Lili? Doesn’t it flatter me?”
He had a great admiration for his cousin, and the Empress often spoke of Queen Alexandra, ‘... her beauty, her sympathetic nature, and her boundless charity. “I would so much like to see my married sister in England,” she invariably added, whenever she discussed her family. “Darmstadt is only a little spot in the garden of my memories,” she would say, “but my mother died there, so I can’t really be blamed for liking Darmstadt… Isn’t ‘Home sweet Home ‘ typically English?”
We set out for church. A disgusting red flag fluttered atop the palace tower; word was going around that residents had called for the double-headed eagle to be taken down from the dome, but this action was forestalled. Enormous numbers of deer have been shot in the Menagerie over the last few days, with soldiers from various units taking part in the slaughter of the poor animals. Yesterday, these hunters were rounded up, putting an end, thank God, to this slaughter and hooliganism.
The Provisional Government has resolved:
There exist obligatory monopolies that the state has no right to renounce. One of these is the monopoly on bloodshed. The state says: “Only I have the right to shed blood. All private bloodshed is forbidden.” Just as it says: “I impose a monopoly on the selling of wine. Any home-brewing of alcohol is forbidden.”
If this monopoly is not maintained by state power, then private alcohol production ensues. The Russian Revolution will be long, bloody and cruel.
Here, by the way, outside our windows we have a procession of lemon-blue flags, one hundred-thousand strong; Ukrainians. And with highly expressive banners; “federal republic” and “independence”.
The whole situation in Russia seems topsy-turvy to me. Can a people’s state of the kind currently being advocated here be established in Russia? And what about “democracy” in the bourgeois sense? After all, there’s no bourgeoisie to speak of there! See more
Poor old Russia has really been put through the wringer over the centuries, what with malignant individuals abusing their power, police overreaching their authority, and general lawlessness. A vast, immense, difficult task lies in store for all and sundry – and, in working towards his own advantage, each individual will be working towards everyone else’s.
I called at the office of the Russian Consul-General in New York. By that time the portrait of Czar Nicholas had been removed from the wall, but the heavy atmosphere of a Russian police station under the old regime still hung about the place. After the usual delays and arguments, the Consul-General ordered that papers be issued to me for the passage to Russia. In the British consulate, as well, they told me, when I filled out the questionnaire, that the British authorities would put no obstacles in the way of my return to Russia. Everything was in good order.
I had recently been thinking of giving a luncheon to the Provisional Government, with an idea of getting into more personal touch with its members and giving public proof of our approval.
But before issuing my invitations I thought it prudent to have some of the ministers discreetly sounded on the subject. How thankful I am that I did! See more
As I have no intention of sheltering myself behind any imaginary instructions from home, I may at once state that I accept the full responsibility for our attitude towards the revolution. It was on my advice that His Majesty's Government consistently acted. Needless to say, I never engaged in any revolutionary propaganda, and Mr. Lloyd George had our national interests far too much at heart ever to have authorized me to promote a revolution in Russia in the middle of a world war. See more
It began to thaw. In the morning Beckendorf and Apraksin were with us; as they left they said goodbye. At 11:00 we went to Mass, Alix got up today. Olga and Tatiana are much better today, but Marie and Anastasia are worse. They have headaches and earaches and are vomiting, I took a short walk and worked in the garden for a while with Dolgorukov. After tea I continued to put my papers in order. In the evening we all gathered together.