Prosecutor Alexandrov brought the same charge against me, as to Lenin, Zinoviev, Kollontai, and others. The accusation is that I entered into an agreement with agents of Germany and Austria with the aim of disorganizing the Russian army, received money from these countries, etc. At the same time, due to the prolonged interrogation, I am convinced that Mr. Alexandrov, counting "proved" that Lenin is an agent of Germany, deduces my guilt from the fact that I 1) came with Lenin from Germany; 2) was a member of the Central Committee of the Bolsheviks; 3) was one of the leaders of the military organization under the Central Committee.
If the prosecutor and the investigator, before arresting me and interrogating me, bothered to make the simplest inquiries, they could find out that I arrived a month later than Lenin, not through Germany, but from America through Scandinavia, and never went into The Central Committee and had nothing to do with its military organization. Therefore, even those external organizational frameworks on which the accusation is based in its fantastic monstrosity are completely inapplicable to me.
I look into the future with anxiety. I believe in Russia’s strength, but think that, unconsciously, great mistakes can be made, which would direct the course of history not in the direction in which they could have, and, especially, that a lot that has been created by Russian history, in the form of a big unified state, can be lost for humanity. See more
Right now the question is in the strength of government.
In the given circumstances, with the country threatened by civil war and facing defeat at the hands of an external enemy, I do not consider it possible to shirk the burdensome duty laid on my shoulders by representatives of the largest socialist, democratic and liberal parties. See more
I shall base any solutions to this problem on my unshakable conviction that the salvation of the republic requires the cessation of party discord, and that nationwide efforts to save the country and its entire people must be undertaken in conditions and forms dictated by the harsh necessity of continuing the war, preserving the army’s fighting capacity and restoring the country’s economic might.
Letter to the Foreign Ministry
"Kerensky has formed a Government composed of six Socialist and eight non-Socialist members. Five of the latter belong to the Cadet party. Aksentieff, the president of the Council of Peasants, becomes Minister of the Interior, and Savenkoff, the former Terrorist, vice-Minister of War. KorniloffCommander in Chief of the Petrograd command - from 18 March 1917 is appointed Commander-in-Chief."
Weather is bright again. We need some rain, but it’s not coming. Very little rain this whole summer. Rye is very thin and spring crops have gone bad.
I’m lying face down on the grass. The grass is damp, still wet from the noisy midday rain. An ant is working exhaustedly right in front of my eyes. He drags a straw—it’s an unbearable burden. I examine him curiously. And him, and his straw, and the green stems of the grass, and the lumps of dried mud. All with curiosity. When I once expected a violent death, I skimmed “Niva.” with curiosity Is it because you read the Niva and follow an insignificant ant at these moments, that there’s no courage, no calm composure to understand to the end and measure of what we call death? See more
There, far beyond the bluish hill, where the birch trees stretch along the slope, are the enemy's trenches. I don’t dare look. I know that now a blast will be heard and, after it, almost at the same instant, the air will howl and clang, and as everything approaches, sounds will ring high in the sky - the sound of whistling shrapnel. And then again the rumble, again a heavy blast, and already the evil spirit is ringing and howling again. Evil spirit? . . .Yes if a person is really deserving, can and must he lie on the wet grass, prone, almost unconscious? Yes, if a person is really worthy, can and must he hear this ferocious howl? But if life is automatically given to someone, someone invisible, and someone infinitely alien has robbed them of it, how can I take this ant’s life, and in taking it, not even regret it, or even remember? Every living person is a real trifle . . .
The prison guards turned a blind eye to any unauthorised interactions amongst the prisoners. Their treatment of us was characterised by a conspicuous degree of caution, even fear. The February Revolution, which resulted in the overthrow of the tsarist dignitaries and put a chunk of the ministerial portfolios into the hands of former exiles and prisoners, sparked a major upheaval in the minds of the prison-keepers. See more
One of them expressed the reasons for his courteousness towards the Bolsheviks in rather frank terms: “You might be behind bars today, but, come tomorrow, you might be ministers too.”
At six o'clock we heard a drosky driven at great speed over the cobbles, and as it came in sight we saw my uncle standing up and wildly waving the papers in his hand, "Free!" he called out. "Anna Alex- androvna, you are free !" The rest is confusion in my mind. There were laughter and sobs. People kissed and embraced me. I was In the drosky driving through Petrograd streets. I was In my uncle's house. The tea table was spread. It was like a dream. See more
After prison one gets used to freedom by slow de- grees. It seems strange at first to be allowed to move about freely, to go to church, to walk, to drive, to go wherever one desires, through woods, along leafy country roads. Not that I was entirely free to go where I liked.
The Germans are already in Kiev and in Pskov. I suspect that they will take Petrograd. Instead of acting and giving all the power to Kerensky and KornilovCommander in Chief of the Petrograd command - from 18 March 1917, they are exhausting their energy in conversations, while evil strengthens. See more