It’s so strange to not see the wounded, to be without this job. On August 28th it would have been three years since we started working at the hospital, but our resignation has ruined everything. But I still hope that maybe, if there’s a lot of work and not enough people, they will bring us back. But it’s just a fantasy - it won’t come true. See more
There’s enough nurses without us. But I doubt that any of them love this job as much as we did, I don’t know if any of them have this feeling of helping people, lessening their suffering. Sometimes you might hurt someone, offend someone unwillingly. All the surgeries are very interesting. How many new people we’ve met! My health wouldn’t allow me to visit other hospitals, which is a shame, and I regret that a lot, but I’ve had no strength for it this last year.
Meanwhile our life gradually settled down along definite lines, and by mobilising all our resources we managed to resume the education of the Czarevitch and two youngest Grand-Duchesses. The lessons began at nine o'clock, and were broken off from eleven to twelve for a walk, which was always shared by the Czar. See more
As there was no schoolroom, the lessons were given sometimes in the large hall on the first floor, sometimes in Alexis Nicolaievitch's room or mine. I lived on the ground floor in what had been the Governor's study. At one o'clock we all assembled for lunch. The Czarina, when she was not well, often took her meals in her own apartments with Alexis Nicolaievitch. About two o'clock we used to go out again and walk about or play until four.
Рождество Богородицы. В 12 часов ходили на службу в Благовещенский собор пешком, я на своем кресле, через городской сад, солдаты расставлены на всем пути, толпа там, где переходили улицу. Очень неприятно, но, однако, благодарна за то, что была в настоящей церкви, за 6 месяцев впервые.
Прекрасная погода. Обедала со всеми. Оставалась дома и читала. Еще со времени пребывания на пароходе болит лицо.
Excellent weather. Got news that Anya Vyrubova, together with the others, should have been brought to the border, wherefrom she should have continued on her way to Sweden. During the trip she was detained and brought to Helsingfors, put aboard the “Polar Star” and in a few days was put in Sveaborg (fortress).
Today it was a little fresher. At 11 o'clock church services were held. We all liked the priest very much who offered the services for us and the four nuns who helped. Alix continued to stay in bed for reasons of caution.
It was a wonderful day — in the shade 19 degrees and on the balcony 36 degrees. Alexis's arm hurt. During the morning we spent an hour in the garden and during the afternoon two hours. Yesterday I began to read L'ile enchantée. During the evening we played dominoes, Alix, Tatiana, Botkin, and I. During tea time, a large thunderstorm came up. It was a moonlit night.
Since they did not allow us to go on the streets, we could not go to the 11 o'clock service at church. See more
After lunch we went into the garden for almost two hours; Alix went out, too. The weather was warm, and about 5 o'clock the sun came out; we sat on the balcony until 6:30. I continued to sort the photographs of my long journey.
I looked around this house and the other one, which is completely unprepared. I’ve been unpacking things and putting our rooms in order. Then I rested. There was a thunderstorm in the afternoon.
Alexis only slept a little. During the night he moved in with Alix. His ear was better, and his arm only ached a little now and then. MarieThird daughter of Nicholas II is better. The day became quiet. All morning I walked around the deck. See more
We went up the Tobol and put ashore on the left bank and went along the road and returned along the river with various difficulties but in a good mood. At 6 o'clock we returned to Tobolsk, and with a loud crash ran into the pier, breaking some of the railings on the side. The day was hot.
A little after 9 we left the Tura and entered the Tobol. We stopped twice to take on food and fuel. On one of these occasions the children went for a walk in the woods. I rose at around 3 as my cabin was very hot. After 6 we arrived at Tobolsk-on-Irtish. See more
We unloaded our things. The house was empty, dirty, and entirely unprepared for us to stay the night. We are once again on the boat, waiting for them to prepare our house and the other buildings.
On board the ship “Rus’”, on the river. I spent all day in bed, a sign of the heart. At around 10 o’clock we ran aground for ¾ of an hour on a sandbar. We stopped three times, to load up on firewood and milk and food for the soldiers. Aleksey and Tatyana gathered flowers on the bank of the river, the bank opposite Pokrovskoye.
I was sitting in the room next to the Tsar’s study, giving last orders and waiting for the train to arrive. I heard one of the kids - Alexey, apparently - running loudly in the hall. For the first time I saw the former Empress just as a mother, anxious and crying. See more
Her son and daughters did not seem to take their departure quite as hard, but they were also upset and very anxious in the last minutes.
My dear martyr, I cannot write, my heart is too full, I love you, we love you, thank you and bless you, and admire you—we kiss the wound on your forehead and your eyes full of suffering. See more
I cannot find words, but you know everything, and I know everything, distance changes our love—our souls are forever united, and through suffering we understand each other even more. All here are healthy, kiss you, bless you, and pray for you without end.
During the night it rained, and the day was considerably fresher. During the day we worked on the small path; we cut down and sawed up two small fir trees. Alix sat with us in the forest. After dinner, the Benckendorf couple visited us. During the evening The Luck of the Vails.